As I mentioned in my first post James is my first born. He is what I call my angel boy. Three weeks before finding out I was pregnant I lost my mom to heart failure. My depression got so out of control all I wanted was to be with my mom. I was 19 at the time and had just gotten out of an abusive relationship and was going to spend the next year or two with my mom in Houston for all the ins and outs of her heart transplant. She didn't make it to the new heart she wound up passing away 3 days after I had gotten there.
I have kinda blacked out most of what all happened around it other than feeling so very alone and not thinking I had a purpose anymore. I remember around thanksgiving starting to question my monthly cycle.. People told me I was under a lot of stress that my mom just died but part of me I guess kinda knew something else was going on. I was too scared to take a test till right before Christmas. Sure enough I hadn't seen a plus sign show up so fast in my life...
I was 88 lbs before I found out I was pregnant. I have always been small for my size. As the months crept by and doctor apt after doctor apt went by I kept getting bigger and bigger. I got HUGE!!! lol He never moved much inside of me. It had me concerned and the dr's concerned so I had lots of ultrasounds which helped to ease my anxiety. He was growing nicely just from me being so small to begin with he didn't have much room to move around. I had heartburn like you wouldn't believe. I craved Taco Bell EVERY single day. I couldn't stand even the smell of chicken... And at the very end my hips hurt so bad I felt like a barbie doll whose legs were about to pop off. Finally at the last dr apt. They did a stress test and set me down in a room all by myself hooked me up to this strange dohicky and told me every time I felt a contraction to push that red button. So I sat, and sat, and sat some more. I felt James start to move like somersaults and a nurse came running in asking me why I wasn't pushing the button. UMM I didn't know what a contraction was supposed to feel like and it just felt to me that he was rolling around. So I panicked and pushed that red button.. lol
I walked out of that office that day with inducement papers we were going to induce James on the 17 of July. I was so happy to have an end in site. I was miserably pregnant and just wanted to hold my baby. On July 15, I was hoping to get the labor started a bit early so I had asked my father to walk with me around the block.. We didn't make it past the neighbors house without my hips hurting so bad I was in tears. My dad had to carry me back home and lay me on the couch. I decided no matter what I was going to make my way to have him the next day. I remember waking up on July 16 and deciding I wasn't going to be pregnant another day. I showed up to the hospital, slammed my inducement paperwork on the nurses station told them I was there and wasn't leaving till he was out... lol
Thankfully they did get me a room and 4 hours later and 3 pushes I became a mom.
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