Well seems difficult to get this kick started up to where I wanted to start it.. At the stage I can't seem to find any help or all different types of help from one side to the other. Most of my posts will be about my experiences from day to day dealing with my preteen son James. He just turned 12 and is quite the big boy already. 32/30 in mens jeans, size 10.5 men shoes. I almost feel at times he's already a man then I have to remember he's only in middle school and I have a LONG way to go. Yep we started middle school this year. I guess I should try to give you a brief rundown over everything involving James so I don't get questions later on.
James has always been a very compassionate, loving, emotional child. If he feels like he is helping you in any way that is when he shines. If he feels you are upset for any reason he believes its his fault. He had a very rough life from being abuse by his bio father in all the ways you can imagine and we spent most of his life homeless and moving from friend to friend. I also made the mistake of trying to date and even was married to a person that joined the military for a while so there was more moving around. James has been hospitalized 7 times for trying to kill himself. He has been to numerous counselors, psychologists, psychiatrists. James is James. When I say that it kinda helps me to realize I have a one of a kind son. Also with all the constant emotions and whiplash style mood swings we were hit with another bit of news that really threw me for a loop. Since James was 3 and talking he always said he was a girl. I would just hide it and say that he was just an emotional boy and that is the way God made him and we would work through it. Amazingly enough at the end of 2012 a doctor did blood work and found out that James does have female DNA.. Now try to wrap your mind around THAT one. I always thought he was just a bigger boy and was getting the infamous man boobies but nope those are female ones he's growing. So yes questions questions upon questions and now we are at middle school and the age where hormones are a raging. Only problem is James has both hormones coursing. We look like a boy to most ppl (was born with boy parts), but the body shape and now feminine things are growing. So mix all that together and trying to parent a child to grow up and feel confident in themselves is proving to be a bit more difficult than I imagined.
On top of everything James has learning disabilities, is dyslexic, and has an IEP at school that makes him feel stupid. YAY us. I was raised in a strict religious home and wanted to be strict with my children. Don't get me wrong they learned manners and being nice to one another no problem. but now with This new phase upon us a whole new adventure we are embarking on. We call it the roller coaster of life. So if you would like take a seat make sure you fasten your safety belt and join us on this adventure of raising James.
Sarah is almost 9. she is my smart mouthed child. She thinks she knows it all. She is also my straight A student and has no problem reminding you of how smart and pretty she is. When she was 5 she actually used the excuse she was too pretty to try and get out of cleaning her room. (didn't work) Sarah is very matter of factly and if you do something she doesn't life she WILL let you know. She is also the cryer. Once you bring something to her attention of what she's done wrong if you do it in a calm fashion she will cry as if you just took away her monster high collection. I have joint custody of Sarah with her father. He has her the most and I get her on weekends and holidays, I do live in the same town now even though it hasn't always been that way. I feel part of me needs to make up for not always being around due to other issues. Yet I don't want to spoil her. I want her to know she is just as much loved as her brother. We butt heads a lot as she doesn't like my skin and she reminds me about it ALL the time. I am hoping as she gets older her attitude will improve and she will lose the holier than though mentality. So this is our adventure as well.. Are you brave enough to join in? Any and all advice is very much wanted and accepted :)
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